Some days it is easy to become overwhelmed by the messiness that is regular life. However, we all have the ability to shift the way we look at things, choosing to find the joy or happiness in the craziness rather than focusing on the negative aspects. In this episode, Jenny and Jai discuss how they have learned to find beauty in the chaos by stepping outside of their norm, expressing gratitude and identifying the things that help them grow as people.

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Jenny  What up? Welcome to The Hollastic Life Show. I’m Jenny. He’s Jai. And we are in the unfuckwithable season. And we are talking about lots of different things that can help you become unfuckwithable in your life, your business, your mental state, all of that good stuff. And today’s topic is drumroll, but I will do it. Well, I didn’t know how long it would be with Mike.


Jai  Nah! You did it better with your mouth. See? Boom! There you go.


Jenny  Beauty in the chaos. And really, you know, every time I say and I think of beauty in the chaos, I can’t help but I do think Beauty and the Beast. Even though it’s not fully what we’re talking about, it does tie in a little bit. Because the thing is, if you’ve never seen Beauty and the Beast, I’m sorry, I don’t know, like, every kid, I feel like I’ve seen it. Although it is possible because we do have people listening from all over the world that maybe this wasn’t like a Disney movie that you grew up with. That’s fine. So basically, the premise of Beauty and the Beast is that Bell, this beautiful young girl basically falls in love with a Beast. And nobody likes the beast and the Beast is up in this castle and the beast is so mean to everybody. And, you know, essentially, it’s like a love story. Like a lot of the Disney princess.


Jai  Isn’t the majority of the Disney movie love story?


Jenny  They’re all love stories, or a lot of them are so or if not all of them. So anyways, she ends up falling for him and they end up having this kiss. And then you know, of course there’s a timeline and all that and then he turns into this beautiful Prince. Handsome, sorry, handsome prince. But I guess I think of that, because it’s like, even that right, the beast brought a lot of chaos to the town, and a lot of distress and anguish and all this stuff to the town and nobody liked the beast. But really all the beast needed was some love.


Jai  What even with it, like, Did he bring that to the town? Like cause he was just trying to do his thing. And you know, it’s kind of like growing up being different, like being bullied. And I’m saying it’s not like you like go around fuck with people. You’re just trying to be you. And people bring that to you because you’re different.


Jenny  I love that because it’s really the way that the town perceived him. And I mean, I don’t know, I don’t remember if this was actually shown in the movie, but we can probably even speculate, right? It’s almost like the town, perceived it that way. And then even gossip between themselves. Oh my god, did you hear about the Beast? Did you hear about the Beast? Oh my God, he’s so horrible. And


Jai  They didn’t like Gaston like gas him up to an oh, he kidnapped Belle. And so let’s go like kill the Beast or whatever. So like, didn’t he like hype that, which, which plays into a lot of everything else and where I feel you’re gonna go with this anyway, but you know, the Beast is different. It’s just he’s trying to deal with his own shit, right? Cause he doesn’t have anywhere. He has his enchanted furniture and shit he could talk to, but nobody really outside of that. And it’s like, yeah, you just want to be understood. You just want to be talked to, you just want to be like, you know, when people look at you a different way, or figuratively speaking, when we’re presented with a certain situation. And it appears to be one way. You know, when you don’t have anyone who understands you, you kind of just just become reserved. When shit seems crazy and everything, you can still find beauty all around you. When it seems like the world is ending. There’s still some kind of joy or happiness to be found.


Jenny  Yeah, and there’s lots of examples in our lives. I mean, even though we’ve started I don’t know if we’ve told you guys yet but we are actually on this Nomad trip right now. We are out exploring around the United States. We are visiting with clients. We are popping in on them and saying yo what up and kind of watching their lifestyle and seeing what’s going on with them. Seeing how we can help them do some on the spot coaching. And we’re also meeting new people exploring. We pretty much have everything that we own minus the stuff that’s in the storage unit. Like back in Florida, we have everything that we own in our car, including our dog. And we have new homes and we go around and really, to some, our lifestyle can look very, very chaotic. And aspects of it are honestly like we’re pretty early into the process, it’s only been like, a couple weeks. It’s been two weeks. And there’s aspects of it that still feel very chaotic. But also too, we could stay stuck in that chaos, we could stay at what I can’t pick out the word. It’s like, it’s like you’re, like clouded by the chaos, right, you can focus on all the chaos. And then even like, think about this as a scenario like where some people do this, right? You’re focused on all the chaos, you can’t believe the chaos is going on, you have to tell everybody about all the chaos, you complain, you become a victim, you go down that path, right, right. And you’re like, Oh, my God, I can’t believe that all about stuff. And I had to carry it up the stairs, and oh my god, then I have to unpack it, and blah, blah, blah. And I don’t know where any of my stuff is. And everything’s all like, whatever. Like that’s our specific example. But think about where there may be chaos in your life or your business. And you are telling the story of the chaos over and over and over and over to people. Because you’re so focused on the chaos, when there are so many things that you could find that are beautiful, right? Whether it’s through gratitude, right, being grateful for what you already have, being grateful for what’s yet to come are grateful for what characteristics you have in your life and people in your life. I mean, you can express gratitude to find beauty. And of course, there’s always nature and natural beauty. I mean, that’s part of our trip. You know, it’s interesting, because I just posted this on my Instagram. I don’t know if you read it. I know you saw the post, I just don’t know, if you read the caption, the one I just did. So basically, it’s like, you know, the thing is, I feel like, a lot of times and I know people I know people where this is the case, you know, you get so focused in your own little bubble. And you get so caught up in the day to day chaos, whether it be from the news or from like, let’s say you have kids at school or from the office and the drama in the office or the drama in the neighborhood or, you know, theory Yeah, the drama, like you just get so caught up in the day to day. And it’s like, oh my god, it’s obvious. And it’s so chaotic. Right? I’m coming from a little bit different of an angle here, because I get told all the time that I’m lucky Oh, wow, you’re so lucky. I wish I could do what you’re doing. You’re so lucky. Oh my god, you’ve had all these great experiences, I want to do what you’re doing, I could never do that. Or, you know, I’m just so busy. I don’t have time for that. All these things. And granted, you know, I say that and it kind of sounds, you know, like that my voice. You know, we have a lot of clients who say those things and we help them through it too. But I just have heard this my whole life. And for me, those are just like, surface the excuses. And even if we stick on the topic here, it’s like, those excuses that come from the chaos.


Jai  I was gonna say like the people who say that, would they even really want to do that? Because we can’t say shit that we really don’t want to do you know, I’m saying just because someone else’s choice looks better than ours. Cause, you know, I think back when I was training and working like sunup to sunset, you know, when I was 6% body fat people were like, Oh, I wish I looked like you but like, do you? Because there’s a certain routine, there’s a certain lifestyle, there’s certain structures, there’s certain things you have to do to obtain that and tie into what you’re talking about. Even with this, this this journey, this pilgrimage that we’re on, you know, I’m saying there’s, there’s certain I think even someone said this certain, certain comforts, that you have to let go of, I’m not gonna say you have to let go of you. You choose to go without rather, you know, like looking for places and there’s certain challenges and obstacles to looking for places that will allow our dog you know, in its current place where we’re sitting in while we’re recording is an actual barn that was basically remodeled into what do we call this a studio? Yeah, basically a studio, you know,


Jenny  Spacious studio. Yeah, it’s upstairs kind of above the garage. 


Jai  Kind of dope. But, you know, kind of gets old too but you know, your thing was, oh, there’s no place to sit outside. You know, but there’s still beauty in everything else. That’s around us.


Jenny  And a lot of times, you have to be willing to step outside the norm step outside, you know, the, what you perceive to be the limitations, you have to step outside that in order to create a situation that supports you in your, like expansion, your growth and even can help bring that beauty, right. Because, yes, there’s no place to sit outside here. But even just think about some of the things that we’ve done. And we’ve only been here a couple of days so far. But just for example, we got up in the morning because it’s like, it’s a studio even though it’s spacious, and there’s places to sit. It’s kind of like the same space, right? And outside. It’s really buggy. So we’re not going to be outside the country for Yeah, like we’re straight up country. So which is but it’s cool, because this country is like 10 minutes away from groceries. And like stuff, it’s close, but it’s really far because it’s a country road. So anyways, like outside is really buggy, so we’re not really gonna sit outside nor is like outside really conducive to that because we are in Florida and like, even though there’s grass, there’s not really grass because it’s sandy, you know, so it’s like a mixture of sand and then a ton of ant hills. And it’s just not like I love outside, but it’s just not like a let me go sit outside and work on this. And let me go sit in the shade under the oak tree. Like it’s not really that type of environment. Right? And so I say that because a couple days ago, we got up and I was like, man, I want to go hiking and Jai’s, like, upon hearing that word. Yeah, he cringes and he shuts down. Men. You know, we realize after our last hiking experience that I may have traumatized him early on in our relationship. So I will take full responsibility. But I said let’s go hiking. He was like rarara… And I was looking because we’re in Florida man. It’s all flat, maybe a slight hill but it’s flat. And you know, some of the trails can be if you’re not into hiking and the outdoors can be boring. Even though I find them enjoyable and interesting they can be boring. So I was looking for something. And we’re really close to one of our favorite springs that when we lived in the Tampa Bay area was like two hours away. So now we’re 20 minutes away. And I said, well, let’s go over here and hike. There’s a short trail like two miles. Let’s go over here. And he was like rant rant rant rant, I was like, No, you should come like come on and and mind you yesterday was a little bit cooler. Because we’re coming into Florida, summer was really muggy. It was cooler, it was overcast, there was like a light on and off sprinkle like it was, it was definitely like an ideal hiking or biking day. Because you’re not out there like dying in the heat. So we go on the trail. And we went for a walk. We didn’t even hike, we just went for a walk on a trail that happened to be in the woods, but it was also alongside the spring. So we kept getting like views of the spring and we got to see all that. And even just that little bit of inspiration, set the tone for our day. Because we got excited, we got out of moving, we came back, we got our computers, we ended up working at a Panera for the rest of the day. And then even today, we’re like, alright, let’s go walk Nietzsche because like I said, Nietzsche is the city dog, right? Nietzsche is our dog’s name. So he’s the city dog. And he’s used to that. But like, you know, I’m not letting them pull into the woods here because I’m a city girl too, even though I love the country. I don’t want to deal with ticks on my dog or whatever. And yes, he may still get ticks by just being out here. But like, if he’s like running in the bush. He’s more likely. So I’m like, No, no, stay close. Oh, stay close, come over here. Stay close. Oh, don’t step on that anthill. Maybe a little bit helicopter mom. But I also don’t want to deal with the repercussions of some of that shit, to be honest. But ya know, we got out we took them out, you know, walking in a park. And it was nice just to be out. Like it didn’t have to be a full day experience. Sometimes I feel like when we think about going to the park or going to the ocean or going to whatever it is that’s nearby or going for a quick bike ride or something, right? You want to go do something to find the beauty in your chaotic day. Sometimes we feel like it’s like this big deal. I don’t have time for it.


Jai  But do it is is some of that due to upbringing, though, to


Jenny  Upbringing conditioning from culture, conditioning from corporate America, conditioning from family and friends, upbring like all of those things. And sometimes it can be a little tough to break out of those. But I think I think the big lesson here is to begin to notice what chaos is showing up for you and your life and your day to day life. And by chaos. I mean, I’m using this term loosely, because chaos could just mean the hustle bustle where you’re not feeling grounded, and you’re not feeling present. Chaos could literally also mean that shit is hitting the fan, I mean, it could be anywhere in that spectrum. So I don’t want it to only mean you know, the most horrible craziest thing you know it’s anything on that spectrum. That’s what chaos is when there’s a lot going on, and you don’t feel that grounding, you don’t feel that presence. And also, when you start to say things like, Oh, I wish I could do that, I wish I could do that. Because guess what you can, you can do those things, you can do those things,


Jai  Making that choice, getting that making a decision.


Jenny  Yes. And also to, you know, if you’re feeling like chaos, like identify where that’s showing up in your day to day life, and then start to just have moments of pause. And you can do this any way anywhere on the spectrum, you may pause, you take a deep breath, and deep inhale in. And then when you exhale, you can do a count of two, or three and count of two or three out, you can do that two or three times, just to pause. And you in that moment, you can pause and look around and see if there’s any vid anything visually, or emotionally you can feel in or you can look at your team or your surroundings or what you have, like, tap into all of your senses, and begin to identify what is beautiful in that moment. What can you be grateful for? How can you really tap into that present moment to bring that peace that love that beauty into the moment and more often into your life. So that’s really a basic way to do it. A simple way to do it all the way up to if you want to start like exploring and giving yourself a little breaks, you know, you can pop in a park a beach, you know, you can ride your ride your bikes, take your dog to a park, you could find some things, you know, you can maybe take a music break, or you could take a meditation break, like there’s a lot of different things that you can do. So you can start to integrate those types of things in your schedule. I used to when I was traveling for sales. Sales can be very chaotic going client to client and people are calling you and you have to respond to things you have to put out fires and all that. And I would when I needed a break and I needed a pause, I needed rejuvenation, I would look on the map. And I would look for green spaces, and I would look for parks. And then I would go for a hike. Even if I was in my heels I would wear my flip flops. And I wear my dress or my outfit or whatever. And I will go walk around the pond or walk around a park or whatever. Go do something like a one two mile hike 10 minute walk, maybe just go sit at the park. Did that a lot, all the time, all the time, because why not? smokers can take smoke breaks, why can’t you go take a walk around the park? Why can’t you go get that rejuvenation at the ocean or something? whatever’s around you. I’ve talked a lot about nature. Jai, what about you? How would you find the beauty in the chaos?


Jai  Music! For me, that’s just usually the number one way to step away and listen to a favorite song. Yeah.


Jenny  Can you give an example? Have you done like, have you had a lot of chaos and then shifted into field chaos


Jai  I feel chaos is a choice. I feel like choosing, like being in the chaos is a choice. Like just because everything around you is chaotic doesn’t mean you have to be a part of it. So now I can’t really give an example. Because I feel it’s one of those things that you do when you practice so much. It just becomes like second nature and you’re on autopilot. So when things tend to be chaotic around you, and you tend to not be around the chaos, you tend to not notice the chaos.


Jenny  Hmm, I love that. Because that’s also there’s a couple of things that I’ll take from that. Because even in the language that I’ve been using in this podcast, you know, identifying chaos, because from being an A type, right? It’s like, Oh, where’s the chaos? on it? You know, like, there’s a part of you that likes the chaos and you like the chaotic energy in some aspects. Of course, when it’s good, positive, chaotic energy versus if it’s like, problem centric, chaotic energy. But you’re like, Oh, I thrive off this. I thrive off the business. But at the same time, I love what you said because it’s really just removing yourself from the identification of Oh, my life is chaotic, or this is so chaotic right now it’s like that, that that languaging and that attachment to the situation. When it’s really not about identifying as chaotic. I am chaotic or my life is in chaos. It’s really noticeable. But even the next levels are not even noticing the chaos because you’re so centered and focused on who you are. And unfuckwithable, I think that’s an aspect of becoming unfuckwithable to.


Jai  Yeah, think about it like oh my god today sucks because it’s raining.


Jenny  You just created a whole bunch of chaos.


Jai  Yep! Now you just decided your day sucks. Because it’s raining.


Jenny  Right or the whole you know, like oh, you spilled something coffee on your whatever on your way out. The door. Oh great. Now the whole day is gonna suck. Now you’re gonna stub your toe and then you’re gonna staple your finger and then you’re gonna, whatever all the things


Jai  Kind of like people who were running late to work for, like if they speed they’re going to get there on time. Shit. You’re already late. Mm hmm, might as well enjoy


Jenny  Own it. Yo, I’m late. What? I don’t know. I think it’s too. It’s just finding ways to be playful and have more fun. That’s also a form of finding the beauty in the chaos. Go back to that childlike state of playful energy. Smiling. Laughing.


Jai  Right! Totally agree.


Jenny  You are so chill right now. What’s going on?


Jai  Nothing like you’re you’re going you’re like, like, slow down. Like, breathe. Take your own advice. Pause. That’s what’s going on.


Jenny  Okay. I’m paused. You go, you take it and close it.


Jai  Thanks for tuning in. Guys. This has been our show. So uh, yeah.


Jenny  Follow us on Instagram @2jholla, H O L L A if you want to see the latest greatest of our journey of our Nomad lifestyle. We have really ramped up on Instagram. We are sharing stories. Our adventures


Jai  We haven’t really ramped up.


Jenny  Oh, we have we


Jai  No, no,


Jenny  We are okay. No, did you follow us three weeks ago?


Jai  No, what I’m saying is like, okay, like, yes, what stuff has been scheduled, but like, you’re definitely seeing more of us.


Jenny  Okay, we had activity on Instagram, the activity is us, if you want to see more of us going on lifestyle, you want to see where we’re at in the world, what’s going on all the cool places, the lessons we’re learning. We’ve been doing stories every day, we also have been doing some igtv some reels, we’re gonna pop in some lives as well. So you definitely want to be on this journey. Come follow us and be a part of that. Reach out to us. If you’re in the United States, and you want to meet us and it can work out, we can kind of hang out, have a little chat and meet you. You can show us your town, shoot us a message. Let us know where you’re based out of and we’ll make sure that if it aligns, we can reach out to you, of course can’t make any promises because the US is really big. And


Jai  Some places are still really crazy.


Jenny  Yes. And even so, there’s also you know, we can’t be everywhere. There’s so many cool places in the world. But let us know where you’re at if you want to kind of link up or you want to show us kind of your backyard shows your beauty and all the chaos. Show us what you’ve got going on in your area and region. You can let us know that too. Of course if you have any questions or if you want to hear any additional topics for this series, or for future seasons and episodes holla at us. Alright, catch you on the next episode.


Jai  You can subscribe to the holistic life podcast from your favourite streaming platform. And don’t forget to check out to stay in the know as an official to 2J’s Insider Mahalo for tuning in. And until next time, that’s our show.

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Season: Unfu*kwitableEpisode 91